mobwifefreak's Blog

One common stumbling block for men who are rusty or inexperienced is deciding how to treat a woman. Should you treat her unfailingly well... or should you treat her in some other way?

In fact - particularly if you're new, or around women you consider "out of your league" - you may find yourself walking on eggshells around women you like, afraid of saying the wrong thing or doing the wrong thing and causing such a girl to lose her temper with you and storm off in disgust.

So how do you treat her?

You may have heard this pithy remark before:

“You treat a queen like a whore and a whore like a queen.”

And today we're going to examine how that applies to the women you meet in day-to-day life.

I see some fellas out there nodding in agreement with this statement; "Aye, that's the way to do it!" they're saying to themselves.

I also see some guys out there shrinking back in terror; "You can't possibly expect me to treat a queen like a whore and a whore like a queen, can you?" they ask, all the color running out of their faces. "They'll hate me! I want them to love me!"

As it were, there's a lot of knowledge packed into this brief phrase - but to a point.

In this article, we're going to break this mentality down, dig into the queen/whore dichotomy, and see exactly why treating one like the other can provide you a boost most men won't ever experience.

how to treat a woman

There's another saying like the one about whores and queens, and it goes like this:

“Tell a beautiful girl she's smart, and a smart girl she's beautiful.”

Just like the whores and queens quote, it's interesting, catchy, and memorable because it seems to be opposite of what you'd expect or think you SHOULD be doing.

Of course you'd treat a queen like a queen, a whore like a whore, a beautiful girl like a beautiful girl, and a smart girl like a smart girl, right? Call a pear a pear.

Except, there's a very good reason for NOT doing things that way, and it has to do with that being the same way that EVERYBODY does them.

Being Attractive is About Not Blending In

Most of my life I sought to stand out and be different, as much as I could, in a cool, appealing way. And I had women take note of me, flirt with me, and try to catch my eye.

I went through a phase once where I said, "Let me try out this whole 'blending in' thing that it seems like everyone else is so interested in. What happens if I try to be like everybody else?" As soon as I succeeded at blending in, girls showed interest in me far, far less.

Women like men who stand out.

Whether that's due to preselection, social proof, conspicuous consumption, remarkably good looks or an impressive male body or great fashion / peacocking, noticeably powerful body language and walk, or anything else, women like men who stand out head and shoulders above the rest in a good way.

Why do women like men who stand out?

Each of the traits listed above communicates something strong, good, and exciting about a man to a woman. They're all worthwhile traits to have, and attractive qualities in a potential mate.

However, there's something else that standing out does, too: it breaks women out of autopilot.

And when you treat a woman differently than what she's accustomed to, this breaks her out of autopilot too.

The more ways you have of shattering a woman's autopilot, the more easily and consistently you can pull this off... and the further out of autopilot she is, the more intrigued she is by you, the more she can't easily figure you out or write you off, and the more time, effort, and energy she needs to expend to wrap her mind around you and find a box to put you in.

When you treat her differently than she's used to being treated, you startle her out of apathy and force her to assess you as an individual - as the man you are, rather than the stereotype she'd otherwise slot you as being.

Greener Grass

how to treat a womanThe grass is always greener on the other side, right?

Imagine you're a queen: a beautiful, amazing girl who's had life handed to her on a silver platter. Imagine how most of the men around you treat you: like the most wonderful, special, perfect creature on Earth.

In fact, it seems like the men compete to see who can treat you more special: each man seems to assume that because every other man is treating you so well, HE must treat you even BETTER than those men.

You get guys:

Licking your boots

Kissing your behind

Showering you with gifts

Praising the very ground you walk on

Thinking you're far, far better than they are

It's nice, you suppose... in fact, it's expected. This is how men should treat you... after all, you're a queen!

Next, imagine you're a whore: still beautiful, but somewhat run ragged by life, bought and used and paid for by men, finding yourself with man after man you aren't really all that attractive for, but they'll suffice, wondering when you're going to meet that great guy who treats you like a great girl but figuring you probably never will.

The men you meet treat you like garbage, much of the time: they're dismissive, rude, or completely inconsiderate of your feelings. To them, you're just a service provider. Some of the men treat you okay, but usually more in a "just business" type way than anything else. A few men treat you well, but these guys are rarely the kinds of men you'd be all that interested in having something more with.

Men:

Talk down to you

Have zero consideration for you

Never go out of their way to do nice things for you

Judge you and moralize against you

Think they're far, far better than you are

That just goes with the territory, you know. That's what it's like to be a whore... the price of this lifestyle is the treatment you receive at the hands of men.

Now imagine you switched these two.

Suddenly, you're treating the queen as if you think you're better than she does. You're teasing her, laughing at her... having a chuckle at her expense. You order her around, expecting her to do as you ask. You tell her what to do.

And just as suddenly, you're treating the whore as if you think she's a goddess. You're complimenting her, warmly interested in her and her story and what she has to say, and building a profound emotional connection with her. You tell her to sit and wait while you take care of things, and go out of your way to make her comfortable and feel good.

Aren't both women's minds completely blown?

I can already hear your objections - "But the queen's going to be insulted and want nothing to do with you!" "Isn't the whore just going to take advantage of you and use you for money or gifts?"

Here's where we need to stop and examine the subtleties.

how to treat a woman

So you have this queen, used to being doted on hand and foot, who both expects top treatment from men and takes it for granted, secretly wishing she could meet a bad boy who'd treat her like she sees the bad boys treat men in the movies. Why does everyone have to handle her with kid gloves?

And you have this whore, used to being treated like mud by the men in her life, wishing she could meet a man who'd treat her like a princess - she knows it's just a movie, but she wishes with all her heart that Pretty Woman - where a charming, wealthy man ends up falling in love with a whore and sweeping her up off the streets into a life of love and luxury - was real life, instead of fiction.

How do you treat a woman the opposite from what she's accustomed to without sending her flying into auto-rejection or tempting her to try and take advantage of you?